50 Days of Gratitude
This is a series of posts that I intend to complete by the end of this year, where I write about things, people and experiences in my life for which I am truly grateful. This is purely my point of view and some of you may disagree with the meaning I have given to these experiences. I humbly seek your forbearance. For those of you who resonate and re-experience these incidents with me, thank you for being part of my journey. I’m thankful that you’re taking the time to read these posts and do share them, if you think it is worth sharing. This belongs to the world now.
Thank you. Live a life of Gratitude. It’s the greatest way to live.
Today I woke up with a dream. A dream where I relived a portion of my life in the past. A portion which I remember with regret and given a chance to relive, I would happily change.
This is about 20 years back when I was living in a rented apartment in Rangarajapuram, Chennai. I had a a run of good luck in business and I wanted to invest my money in a property since I didn’t own any at that time. My first thought was to buy the flat that I lived in, since it was a great place; my life was fantastic here, great people, great experiences, and good run in my business. I loved it. Life was great here. Let me buy this place and live here forever.
So I approached my house owner and asked him if he would sell the flat to me. He flatly refused. Said this was bought for his daughter and it had brought good luck for her and he would never ever sell this. I can stay there, but I can’t buy it.
So what do I do? I go around looking for an alternate property and after many near misses in different flats in the same area, I end up buying a flat in the same apartment complex. But I continue to stay where I lived, and had my parents move into the flat I have bought. Within a few months, my luck turned for the worse and I started bleeding profusely in the businesses I was in. Money just ran out and to meet the mounting expenses, I took a housing loan for the flat I owned. In a year or so, I could not meet the housing loan EMI and I ended up selling it within 2 years of buying it. For the same price I bought it.
Are you thinking, I could have moved into the own flat and used the rent to pay EMI? I did consider that option, but there was so much negativity to that flat itself, with stories of how all those who stayed there before this, having fallen into tough circumstances that I had to have my parents move from there and sell the place.
5 years from then, the flat was worth 4 times the amount I sold it for. I was still struggling for money and I regretted the decision I took to sell it. And now and then I still do.
That was the point of the dream. I was trying to rearrange my life in a manner where I had bought the flat I was staying in and things would have been so many times better in my life in terms of money saved, earned, wealth created, experiences had, etc. etc.
But awake, I ruminated on the fact that if that one incident was different and that flat owner actually did sell me the flat I wanted, rather than sell it a few year later to someone else, then my life would be so so different today. Yes. He sold it later and I missed buying the flat I so badly wanted.
But is it so? Do you think that if we just change one incident in our past, we would still have all the good parts that we have today, plus the upside of the reversed decision with us? No. You are wrong! It is not possible to change just that one thing and still have all the good things that we currently have. That one change would have altered the whole symphony of our life and rendered a completely new version of our life with some new portions that we could still be uncomfortable with.
What is life? Is it just all good memories and great experiences? Do you think that you will be happy then? Wrong again. Imagine listening to a beautiful music symphony where all the notes where high. This would be considered noise. You need the lows and the silences between these high notes to extract the juice of the music and make it your own. You cannot be moved by just high notes alone.
Our life is a symphony. Our creator plays this symphony through us and creates a unique piece that makes us who we are. Our creator uses the high notes and the low tones of our life’s highs and lows to create this unique life for us. We need both to enjoy the music of our life.
I’m truly grateful now that I did not get that apartment, at that time. If I had, my life will not be the same now. I’m happy with everything in my life now. Why risk it?